Woody Says: Orgy Schmorgy! What's the Next Shot?

Mon., Aug. 4, 2008 4:50 PM PDT by

Javier Bardem, Scarlett Johansson, Vicky Cristina Barcelona Victor Bello/TWC 2008

Watching Scarlett Johansson get it on with Javier Bardem and Penélope Cruz may be the stuff of fantasy to large swaths of middle America. But for legendary director Woody Allen? Meh.

Bardem, Johansson and Cruz make sun-kissed love in Vicky Cristina Barcelona, a summery, sultry romance that includes makeouts every which way, including a hookup between Johansson and Cruz in a sweltering photo-development darkroom.

But for Allen, who talked about the movie during a Los Angeles press conference Sunday, the sex scenes were "nothing."

"They just kiss and kiss and kiss," the legendary director said about a steamy scene between Bardem and Johansson. "And then when it's over, that's it. Lunch! And there you go. They're actors. There's nothing to it. They're kissing for a couple minutes, there, and I watch, and then it's over. And we move on to the next thing."

The "next thing" for Allen? An opera. Yes, really. Allen is in Los Angeles to direct a one-act comedic opus that debuts next month. Allen first agreed to do the show years ago, as a favor to pal Placido Domingo, who runs the Los Angeles Opera. Not that Allen is looking forward to it.

"This was like three years ago," says Allen, 72. "And I thought, eh, I'll be dead in three years. So I said OK. And then I didn't die."

Vicky Cristina Barcelona opens Aug. 15.

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